Monday, December 12, 2011

Happy Adoption Day, Aidan!

FLS waiting adoptive parents, Lance & Ragan, opened themselves up to other opportunities while they were in our program and were able to adopt their sweet, baby boy through successfully networking this fall.  Ragan wrote the following to share their family's journey to encourage others.

Our son has arrived, and even though it has been more than 12 weeks, I can still hardly believe that I am a Mommy and that Lance is a Daddy and that Aidan is really ours forever!! God blew my mind with how He built our family. And He knows exactly what I need. He knows I needed a VERY easy and laid back child for my first one, since I am such an infant novice (and am a little high strung at times!). He knew that it would work better if I had ZERO notice about his birth and our being chosen as his parents, so that I would not be anxious and try to control everything! (Imagine a female doing that!) And He knew that He would give me the strength, the mental, emotional and physical capacity to make so much happen in such a short time, including moving to a new home, flying to Florida to meet our new baby, visiting the NICU daily for just under four weeks, and then finally leaving Florida after five weeks, unpacking boxes and cleaning our new home from top to bottom - oh, and did I mention there is taking care of a newborn in all of this?!

Yes, Lance and I are a glorious testimony of the fact that God will build families His way and in the timing that He determines is best - no matter how we prayerfully (and perhaps tearfully) wrestle with Him to do otherwise. That being said, I know that how "God found us for Aidan" was nothing short of a miracle. We had been in the waiting pool only two months (and we debated even getting in the pool because of Lance's upcoming military deployment), feeling strongly led to jump in, although we thought, "What Mom in her right mind, who wants her child to be in a two-parent home, would place her child with a couple who would be separated for nine months and maybe forever with the dangers of combat?!"

Not only this, but we were putting ourselves on hold with FLS on September first, so that we wouldn't lose more time in the pool. And since God loves to come at the 11th hour, He did so with a phone call on the evening of Aug. 29, telling us that Aidan (who we didn't even know was being created!) had been born to a woman in Florida on Saturday the 27th of August. At 5PM on the 30th, we received the call from the case worker that we had been chosen and needed to be on a plane to Florida asap, because Aidan's birthmother wanted to meet us. So, I was on a plane at 11AM on the 31st, while Lance remained behind, because the movers were arriving that day. Throughout the adoption process, I had prayed for an 11 day old baby, because I knew that, in Virginia, the birthmother has ten days to change her mind. And God blew my mind, because He gave us Aidan on day four of his life...this little 4lb 15oz drug-exposed preemie! Only God can do that. He loves to lavish His children with "abundantly more than all we ask or imagine"! And He did so with this one.

Aidan came to us, not through Family Life Services, but because Deanne sent a previous email about twins needing a home asap and letting us know if we were interested to call the agency involved directly. And so, while I was house hunting, I called and sent all of our info immediately to Utah. And for whatever reason (ONLY GOD!!), the adoption staff at the organization loved us. So they presented us to that birth mother. She didn't choose us, so no twins. Then they presented us to another birthmother - she was interested but also didn't choose us. And then Debbie called from the hospital wanting to place her child and asked the agency to choose the adoptive parents. Unanimously, they chose us. And the rest is history...and now our present and future!

So all I can say, being on the other side of the infertility and waiting challenges, is hold on to hope and never stop believing that your child will soon be in your arms. Try everything and don't limit God on His method of putting your family together. God knows...He knows I was not equipped for twins! And He knows that Lance and I really wanted a boy first. So, what may seem like a great loss with disappointment when a birthmother doesn't choose any of us, in reality is a tremendous blessing! He knows how you are equipped as well and what you really want and need. And He is a gracious and abundant Provider.

I pray our story, though rare in so many degrees, will encourage those who have had to wait for their child to arrive and to be chosen as parents and whose trials have been the same as or greater than ours to trust in God and to remain in the Vine, for if you don't, you will feel ashamed of your unbelief when God showers you with His knowing and compassionate love. May God build your family quickly! And may He grant you rich grace and patient understanding if His 'quickly' is not the same as yours. God bless!

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