Friday, June 10, 2011
Father's Day is soon approaching - June 19th. That gives you just a little over a week to pick out the new polo shirt, neck-tie, candy, golf balls, or gift certificate that has become our standard of saying "I love you"!
No doubt, fathers are to be celebrated and have a unique job description that is just as important, but different, than that of a mother. There seems to be less emphasis on the emotions that surround Father's Day for men who are waiting to become fathers (through adoption) or men who have made the decision to place a child for adoption with another family.
The reality is - men have feelings too. Although they don't display feelings, hurts, and disappointments as openly as women tend to do, that doesn't mean that the feelings aren't there. If you are an adoptive family and you have the privilege of having communication with your child's birth father, take a moment to remember him in a special way next weekend. It can be as simple as having your child color him a picture, sending him a photograph, or sending a card to let him know that you haven't forgotten about him.
If you don't have contact with your child's birth father, Father's Day may be a good opportunity to talk with your child about his or her birth father and share the information that you do know about him in an age-appropriate way. A great children's book about talking to children about birth parents, when information may not be available, is Forever Fingerprints by Sherrie Eldridge.
For more thoughts on birth fathers and Father's day see When is Birth Father's Day?